I joined LAM back in March, right after I met my husband. I had a
letter from one of the ladies here (no idea who it was) who basically told
me to run away from him as fast as I could. I was so appalled that I unsubscribed.
I didn't want to really and truly listen to the negative things. As soon
as I married him, I re-joined LAM and believe me, I have repented of not
listening to wise counsel here in the first place.....
If I could turn back the hands of time, I would go back and drop this
guy like a hot potato! He has messed up my life and the lives of my children,
toyed around with my heart and left me heartbroken. We have a 6 month old
baby and I am now having to make a plan to escape from him in order to
protect her since I heard from one of his aquaintances that he is planning
to take her back to egypt and drop her off with his family, while he comes
back here to another city to continue to work. He has a wife and son there
in Egypt and is waiting for his green card through me.
I would have never ever thought anything like this could happen to me.
He was the most generous, kind and sweet man I ever met. He convinced me
he loved me so much and I suppose in the face of my recent separation from
my first husband, he told me everything I wanted to hear. Promising me so
After we were married he began having all these phone conversations with
his family, and they soon discovered that they could call here for free through
the internet. Seemed like the phone rang non-stop. I told him I never thought
a group of people on the other side of the earth could be in our daily life
One particular sister called here on a regular basis, or he called her.
He would spend great lengths of time talking and talking with her....only
for me to figure out later that he was talking with his wife. Sometimes he
was even lying in the bed beside me...holding me, stroking my back or playing
with my hair--so much love for me while he was talking to his lovely "sister"....
makes me gag now!
She called here a few days after I had the baby...at 6 am.... he was talking
to her and telling her my baby's name. It made me so crazy that I felt like
I was going to go over the edge. Then he told me he never agreed that I could
raise her as a Christian.
He has come in like a flood and taken over my life and the lives of my
other 3 kids. I could never have imagined it in a million years. My friends
said our home had peace when we were first married. How lovely! I was the
happiest woman in the world then!
Now, our phone has been cut off repeatedly because he sends so much money
to Egypt and lets the bills pile up here. Our phone bill is so high from
him calling over there-- yet he gets mad at me for calling my sister and
talking for an hour for a few dollars on the bill. The electric
bill is always a turn-off notice before it is paid. He denies always that
he sends any money over there.
I taped a phone conversation last Thursday of him speaking with his brother-in-law.
This is high-tech stuff---I had the baby sleeping in our room and held my
6 year old's tape recorder up to the extension while holding the mute button.
I had some of the tape translated by an Egyptian lady and he said he was
sending $200 the next day. Last night, a guy he owes money to called and
was hotter than hell for his money. I asked him where the money was and he
said he would have it on Friday. He sent it to Egypt. But he sat here, looked
me straight in the eye and told me he hasn't been able to send ANY money
to Egypt for over a month because of ME!!!! He lies and blames me for it!
If I could say one thing to you, I would say run away from him as fast
as you can. I don't think all of them are like him, but many are or worse.
The family connection is more than any of us can bear, I think. Their thinking
completely opposite from ours, but they play a good game until they are
married. Even the Egyptian lady friend, when I told her how he changed after
we were married, she told me this is "normal" and that they all do this.
She told me when they are engaged, they promise you everything, but after
you are married, they give you nothing. After marriage, you are like a slave---supposed
to be ready at their every beck and call!
This Egyptian lady wants her younger sisters to be able to come to USA
and marry american muslim men so that they can be treated nicer. Trust us
when we tell you that this marriage---although seems like a dream, will
later become like a nightmare.
I don't mean to discourage you, but then again maybe I mean to discourage
you--- discourage you from pursuing so much trouble and heart ache for your
If I could hug you now, I would....with all my heart!